i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
After tacos, we're chasing women.
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