He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize