Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize
