This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
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