There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
