so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
the raccoons are back...
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