Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
