we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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