my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I just want to make out with him forever
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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