goodnight i made you a song goodbye
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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