I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
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