KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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