Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
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