How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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