i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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