Yo dont text me then not text me
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
