would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
