I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
