My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Randomize
