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dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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