I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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