he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
someone owes me an orgasm
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize
