I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
