I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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