I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
pray to the hookup gods
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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