Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
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