It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
