My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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