:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize
