I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Randomize
