You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Randomize
