She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
