How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
