when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I'm just crazy horny about you
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize