You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
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