I want to stick my p in your. b.
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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