No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
