cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
