What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Randomize