So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
