I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
as a side note pls kill me
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Randomize
