as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
