i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
