It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
