Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Randomize
