who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
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