I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
