how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Randomize
