I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
i think my cat just said my name.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
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