Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Randomize
