Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Randomize
