im drinking this country out of the recession.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
This is the prime rib incident all over again
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
She told me I should be a condom model.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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