He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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